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标题: 中 外 互 译《 秘 籍 笔 谈 》共 享 平 台 [打印本页]

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-13 09:11
标题: 中 外 互 译《 秘 籍 笔 谈 》共 享 平 台


可爱的译友朋友:



   
    当您听到、读到、或想到,那些有助益我们、做中外文互译的、声音、文字、信息,如果您喜欢、并乐于同译友们互惠互利,共享共赢,结出

更多、更好的翻译成果,请您随时、信手在此留下博爱一笔:

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-13 09:26
1.(样稿)


That was long ago.Today neither of them is alive,                     (两者都不:单数)
Not the hare, nor the man who made the gesture.       (同位,割裂修饰,代词前置词)

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-13 18:20
可爱的译友们:



   
       当您听到、读到、或想到,那些有助益我们、做中外文互译的、声音、文字、信息,如果您喜欢、并乐于同译友们互惠互利,共享共赢,结出更多、更好的翻译成果,请您随时、信手在此留下博爱一笔:







作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-13 18:24
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-13 18:20
可爱的译友们:

1.

O my love, where are they, where are they going
The flash of a hand, streak of movement,rustle of pebbles.        (直接引语无问号;割裂修饰代词)

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-13 18:25
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-13 18:24
1.

O my love, where are they, where are they going

2.

That was long ago.Today neither of them is alive,         (两者都不:单数)
Not the hare, nor the man who made the gesture.       (同位,割裂修饰,代词前置词)

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-13 18:27
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-13 18:25
2.

That was long ago.Today neither of them is alive,         (两者都不:单数)

3.

I ask not out of sorrow, but in wonder.       (并非 ... ...,而是 ... ...)

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-14 10:27
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-13 18:27
3.

I ask not out of sorrow, but in wonder.       (并非 ... ...,而是 ... ...)

Oh, there wasn't a thing that didn't respond   (否定之否定=肯定)
哦,所有的一切都做出了回响

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-14 10:28
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-14 10:27
Oh, there wasn't a thing that didn't respond   (否定之否定=肯定)
哦,所有的一切都做出了回响

4. Oh, there wasn't a thing that didn't respond   (否定之否定=肯定)
     哦,所有的一切都做出了回响

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-14 10:39
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-14 10:28
4. Oh, there wasn't a thing that didn't respond   (否定之否定=肯定)
     哦,所有的一切都做出了 ...

5. And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made:  (限定语后置;分词滞后短语)
    在岛上盖间小茅屋,用泥土和枝条:

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-14 10:54
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-14 10:39
5. And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made:  (限定语后置;分词滞后短语)
    在 ...

6. His place, as he sat and as he thought, was not   (程度倒置,状语割裂,一谓双主)
In anything that he constructed, so frail,
So barely lit, so shadowed over and naught,

其如此 ... ... ,以致 ... ... 不为人所思、所置于 ... ...

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-14 11:05
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-14 10:54
6. His place, as he sat and as he thought, was not   (程度倒置,状语割裂,一谓双主)
In anything ...

7. NEVER seek to tell thy love
   Love that never told can be; (叠加前置词;着重倒装)

永远不试图说出你的爱
爱从来就不能被说出来;

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-15 19:48
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-14 11:05
7. NEVER seek to tell thy love
   Love that never told can be; (叠加前置词;着重倒装)

8.    Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled               (一主双谓:a多么b ... ...,而又多么c ... ...!)
  And paced upon the mountains overhead   
  And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.        

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-19 10:22
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-15 19:48
8.    Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled               (一主双谓:a多么b ... ...,而又多么c  ...

9.

Why should the world be over-wise,
为什么,我们要聪颖卓越,要智慧超然,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
要心中有数,所有泪水和伤感?
Nay, let them only see us, while
而且,而且,还要,还要啊,面具,
We wear the mask.
戴着面具,彼此看清,让那所有,一目了然。         (不但要1. ... ... 而且 “ 在1.前提下/基础上 ” 更要/还要 ... ...)








作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-20 10:15
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-19 10:22
9.

Why should the world be over-wise,

10.  loved the pilgrim Soul in you
       宠我倔倔强强大执著,                          (借代=大写)


                                    how Love fled
       And paced upon the mountains overhead
       And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.      
             爱呀,走得好快捷/艰难                    (特指=大写)






作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-11-30 10:24
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-20 10:15
10.  loved the pilgrim Soul in you
       宠我倔倔强强大执著,                          (借代=大 ...

11.

take care of their physical
wounds,
their psychological
wounds,
their moral
wounds.                       (祈使省略,一谓三宾)






作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-12-1 20:45
李世纯 发表于 2018-11-30 10:24
11.

take care of their physical

12.

When I was down beside the sea
A wooden spade they gave to me
To dig the sandy shore.                    (宾语前置)

My holes were empty like a cup.
In every hole the sea came up,
Till it could come no more.                (状语前置)






作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-12-3 16:41
李世纯 发表于 2018-12-1 20:45
12.

When I was down beside the sea

13.
I have passed by the watchman on his beat
And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain.     (一助词,双谓语)

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-12-8 13:28
李世纯 发表于 2018-12-3 16:41
13.
I have passed by the watchman on his beat
And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain.     ( ...

14. I years had been from home     (时间状语前置)
作者: 李世纯    时间: 2018-12-11 06:54
李世纯 发表于 2018-12-8 13:28
14. I years had been from home     (时间状语前置)

15.
Futile---the winds---
To the heart in port---   (表语前置)

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2019-1-24 10:52

16.

It reminded him how he had needed
A place to go to in his own direction,

How he had recomposed the pines,
Shifted the rocks and picked his way among clouds,

For the outlook that would be right,
Where he would be complete in an unexplained completion:

The exact rock where his inexactnesses
Would discover, at last, the view toward which they had edged,   ( 同位词语诗句 )

Where he could lie and, gazing down at the sea,
Recognize his unique and solitary home.                         ( 同位词语诗句 )






作者: 李世纯    时间: 2019-1-30 11:02
李世纯 发表于 2019-1-24 10:52
16.

It reminded him how he had needed

17.

Working in a foreign province, my dialect needs to adapt to Mandarin with a Hubei edge.
adapt to;regularly;used to;accustomed to

习惯于…, 使适应于,习以为常




作者: 李世纯    时间: 2019-1-30 20:06
(18)

A Red,Red Rose O my Luve's like a red, red rose,  That's newly sprung in June:  O my Luve's like the melodie,  That's sweetly play'd in tune.   As fair art thou, my bonie lass,  So deep in luve am I;  And I will luve thee still, my dear,  Till a' the seas gang dry.   Till a' the seas gang dry, my dear,  And the rocks melt wi' the sun;  And I will luve thee still, my dear,  While the sands o' life shall run.   And fare-thee-weel, my only Luve!  And fare-thee-weel, a while!  And I will come again, my Luve,  Tho' 'twere ten thousand mile!  

1.  luve 苏格兰方言,= love, 大写L,表达了“重要”和“唯一”的内涵。 2.  melodie 来自法语,是19、20世纪法国从德国的抒情歌曲学来的,它是带伴奏的艺术歌曲。19世纪的melodie一般用严肃抒情诗做歌词,由钢琴伴奏的独唱演员演唱。Melodie 的特点是诗歌与音乐的完美统一。因此,melodie 准确地说不是“乐曲”、“曲调”,而是“歌曲”。 3.  play’d = played 诗歌用字 4.  art 古英语,第二人称系动词, = are 5.  thou 古英语,第二人称主格, = you 6.  bonnie 苏格兰方言,健康的,美丽的,可爱的,可人的 7.  lass 年轻未婚女子,姑娘;多数用于非正式对少女的称呼;因与lassie有关,所以也有女性恋人的意思 8.  a’ 诗歌语言, = all 9.  gang 苏格兰方言, = go 10.wi’ 诗歌语言, = with 11.thee 古英语,第二人称宾格, = you 12.o’ 诗歌语言, = of 13.fare-thee-weel 诗歌语言, = (bid)farewell (to)thee 14.tho’ 诗歌语言, = though 15.‘twere 诗歌语言, = it were (起到省略一个音节的作用)




作者: 李世纯    时间: 2020-8-17 11:48
19.  原作之原貌于世,天生唯一,无可替代;翻译作品良莠与否不在原貌体现与否,而在是否达成原作主观预期与客观感应完美对接最大化

作者: 李世纯    时间: 2020-8-17 11:54
20.   成功翻译作品有如成功无人机、成功智能机器人,让主客双方信息交流、沟通,精准、无障碍
作者: 李世纯    时间: 2020-8-17 11:58
21.    简言之,翻译追求作品传递信达雅,非作品原貌




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