作者:查尔斯.布考斯基" k" A$ w% }/ R, w$ X
翻译:莫笑愚8 [; L3 |$ r% A/ E; v
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《自杀的孩子》$ x7 g# _/ ]- s4 a* j. ?
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我去了最糟的酒吧
: a6 b! W( z+ z% I) ?) g7 z指望在那儿) |& R: a9 c7 z( [2 {1 @7 }- M7 y
被谋杀。 G" X" R6 I4 i+ t; @
但我所能做的只是3 C/ S2 |- {* w( W% U7 `
再次将自己
; c; e/ a- r! b$ g灌醉。
. \% W3 ]0 u3 m- _/ }3 e更糟的是,酒友们甚至5 P t8 ~! q+ R! n
开始
# l7 F( B1 |/ x5 J. ~喜欢我了。
7 d) p0 v! n* z) y6 i我在那儿只想惹怒别人 L5 C5 d8 G7 X4 {
并被推入黑暗的
% s7 X; O" _% M% d% A/ m2 E8 g深渊
0 o8 y' A" {( p% {结果是我赢得了
/ U {, {: i/ m免费饮品
; _% l% D: T( `& g' X恰逢某地
' b" y) O/ [0 q. M- v& z某个
4 W, \: `8 Q! S) U j' H6 [龟儿子躺在医院的
# q; J& x9 E4 D0 q% l5 g% c; @病床上,3 A/ S. P/ I$ F& n- O: R
全身插满了
+ l4 a6 x- m, N2 s4 |管子
0 N9 X. e% k+ U4 S为了活着,他拼命挣扎
( ^+ w; q9 D8 |- x6 J9 T" ^使出了吃奶的劲。. [3 a& i5 N# t. _) U% }/ {
无人会助我
+ B$ O2 ^* i+ w) _2 l1 e$ n4 N死亡2 Z: k/ B4 P* v4 I( e
当我们畅饮2 C+ P( p: n3 f% T
达旦,$ U* ]8 i" D6 _
当第二天2 K2 C6 X: i$ r2 T2 M2 P
等着我
" `8 X% D" |* K3 F. }! Z用它的钢钳,0 v# j) x* d. Q$ ~ D
用它臭气熏天的
2 j V% ~. G8 |, n5 g1 W) |; c; ]匿名,
, a" `0 g b3 P4 Z+ H/ t! c0 N它暧昧的
3 W7 W6 N @) U' g. d( N态度。2 P" k( h+ G* U8 k) x4 t. m% d
死亡并非总是
* f( V7 s9 ^" f9 ^% ^( n如期而至5 m' d! _9 L8 \2 n
当你呼唤0 ^0 Y; T" L5 d/ i' S- V P
它,
& a3 X% f/ S; }3 U8 V哪怕你从一个( p, j2 w8 @4 N% p+ x/ F
闪光的
) Q0 Y# W+ F% M6 S# ~城堡+ c2 {+ i& G9 f$ l
或者从一艘远洋游轮
7 q* B' T4 d" Y或者从地球上) t3 v! J5 o- J: v, |
最好(或最差)
- a4 {2 y; I1 g+ `0 o2 T" I的酒吧呼
: [2 G5 w4 i" j, p8 R/ ~2 v% G唤它。
8 ]' N' v# L1 ~4 h, e4 V, F如此无礼5 T0 k8 f$ R% W" \. a1 p9 N Y
只会令众神, `; z, J+ k# N# K
犹豫并
9 ^, A) ]7 a: j/ ?& r, v+ s推迟死期。7 l% S/ q, c# E
问我:我已
" S4 _& D' f. n+ k72岁了。
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《致拿走我诗歌的荡妇》7 h% K, ~8 ?$ o+ ~' z/ P
& Q" f! j( G8 U5 @# K% E有人说该让悔恨远离
! l' S" {# @ w4 ]0 g7 x诗歌,9 ], G/ r1 c$ z6 {5 x7 v3 H0 u; o
该抽象,这貌似有理,
# z" `$ ~6 e: A" n但是耶稣啊;
) \& N, Q* x: ?2 i# h+ B" D- ~3 y12首诗歌失踪了我连尸首也找不到而你还拿走了
2 P- R4 X$ a3 g' v1 C- }- J我的
5 s8 o. G, d2 Y" s8 v! F! n7 S油画,我最好的墨宝; 这令我窒息;
. O3 B; e! N9 ]( K难道你也像她们一样要榨干我的皮?; ]/ ]' f/ p; w: Y
为何不拿走我的现金?她们通常会从一个醉醺醺1 o+ Y4 ~& ^5 X2 ^& C I1 Y
昏睡在角落的醉鬼裤兜里拿走金钱8 d! k5 K" W6 d6 B) }5 K W8 E
下次就拿走我的左臂或者一张50元的钞票/ k0 T+ I) v7 v: c0 p
但不要拿走我的诗歌:5 E/ C# {$ a/ K/ o# E- z3 L, {% g0 r
我并非莎士比亚
# l* V2 r& {6 ?但有时候就是
- i! a5 [/ Q" a$ c再也不会有诗歌,抽象或其它;# b S1 l* d6 Q/ }: A! X5 M
但钱和荡妇和醉鬼却总是遍地皆是
9 f& }5 F+ `7 p4 [直至最后一枚炸弹,
7 ?" ]$ C. m A但正如上帝所说," U4 }5 ^/ k& V% X& h' e
当他翘着二郎腿儿,$ u# c0 H. Y7 n7 F$ k2 A9 E+ }/ G
我知道我在何处造就了许多诗人/ k" [" N' R# B! e8 q
而并非众多
/ A' f( x# J( m; `" V诗歌。- z! F& W7 l+ z7 c
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$ n2 P# y5 ~4 p附英文原文:/ J* K: V( G9 I7 c7 y' p
- T- K/ ^/ D% i! N
THE SUICIDE KID% j4 l6 @$ q( r3 N( r) W6 E
by Charles Bukowski
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I went to the worst of bars) s9 o; Q. m4 @2 o& m
hoping to get
/ |1 m+ \ W( |, Q1 y) `killed.
" \$ [+ h B$ _5 l: V, ^ \2 qbut all I could do was to
! h- j2 D/ g7 ~, F$ q# V1 sget drunk
4 y" R! n2 G+ W; t! x8 V7 w, Dagain.
. P* q) i6 y* p4 Z; N: oworse, the bar patrons even
! Y; _% |5 f3 j, p9 ^* @. _ended up9 @! y( x a6 S5 c
liking me.
9 m2 B8 q7 ]8 Jthere I was trying to get
4 b9 J, \+ C8 S% Jpushed over the dark# X8 r: a! J; x2 K7 \. X
edge6 T" F" o( t: Q6 W) V& e4 C
and I ended up with$ _$ }( l6 p4 `& v( F
free drinks
# t' K! } ~4 J' Z* `- Y" C$ Qwhile somewhere else& ]) q. Q3 G/ S: ]- @+ u! z
some poor. J1 e4 A; {+ C& e
son-of-a-bitch was in a hospital* c+ ~6 ^3 g' e# g- M3 {8 e
bed,
! w) _; P I$ ~1 L9 V. |tubes sticking out all over
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as he fought like hell
! [+ C0 M" q) q m) T8 p2 Eto live.
8 [9 d/ R$ ^! Bnobody would help me0 B; l- M+ }, ]
die as
6 B0 J- ]2 Y4 p1 athe drinks kept
/ ^' x3 Z. C8 f( o! dcoming,
E( z+ o5 c7 |: v3 v+ yas the next day
3 w$ n# A8 a l8 m* Nwaited for me9 Y; _. \4 S2 [8 p
with its steel clamps,
/ i* X& }5 A. {& Q; k3 aits stinking
- W7 A9 ^2 S; \anonymity,
) N9 ~4 z/ c9 k* }its incognisant ; A1 ~0 o2 o* E; b
attitude.
0 f/ i+ V$ v5 g# H( `* g5 fdeath doesn’t always
- k' {8 D3 I9 S; ^+ Pcome running
3 J8 h) v4 G9 z1 x' `; owhen you call, ~9 h- O, j1 }' g$ I
it,
& G- \' D: [9 X8 [not even if you* k! v6 c; F3 N& S
call it; _* p, R+ U/ P& I3 p$ L# _
from a shining' \& }* a8 k2 b ?0 R
castle% w! v7 Z5 N" O" V" C1 Q
or from an ocean liner
4 p+ \& X* A! o& H: E% S+ p9 xor from the best bar `2 z, D! h( A
on earth (or the- Q: d9 k- L' i, k" ?1 S8 G" w9 a
worst).& w" v. h" o: |3 U8 x
such impertinence: S/ T, b( j) w, f+ w/ Y$ `
only makes the gods
1 z3 Z5 H$ o* E( y. ~1 Thesitate and1 D$ H0 X# y+ _5 n
delay.
, D% H n5 }; B! h- Gask me: I’m. a8 a r9 o; P, l) F
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6 y0 R% a, w! j. u$ U u. vTO THE WHORE WHO TOOK MY POEMS- J8 |3 s* T0 |$ {2 f
BY CHARLES BUKOWSKI
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& q1 p: \8 }5 Y4 W# Isome say we should keep personal remorse from the
$ |; S2 w ?' ~$ Xpoem,
+ Q2 |) F' {* `! [0 cstay abstract, and there is some reason in this,
) L) `) r9 S. @: R; C/ Lbut jezus;* t: Q0 l- h& a. p3 i( K! I
twelve poems gone and I don't keep carbons and you have+ H' r3 f. N5 V
my % [+ s7 ?. H0 u2 Z
paintings too, my best ones; it's stifling;
& D0 |5 F2 n" B4 ~are you trying to crush me out like the rest of them?, N s5 [1 Q g- X& I/ [5 |" R
why didn't you take my money? they usually do
3 _2 t. g( |" ^" J. v% m( E; `from the sleeping drunken pants sick in the corner.
: J! `& P5 q% I2 ]next time take my left arm or a fifty
0 Q* l3 s$ p1 K6 A/ K, ubut not my poems:
( n; [- d6 R3 y# {0 aI'm not Shakespeare
8 h' Z# w5 c8 H7 u4 K! G. nbut sometime simply
7 W8 s! c# k9 {7 n" ]0 K- p: uthere won't be any more, abstract or otherwise;& n9 T- l# |& ]/ w
there'll always be money and whores and drunkards
; C# I. c( u' g8 G* Cdown to the last bomb,
4 w& ?; z5 T. B) j" rbut as God said,
y5 V1 m/ W+ Bcrossing his legs,
. X, w+ P0 {9 ]' L% A5 C5 jI see where I have made plenty of poets
8 {$ ]; d, i3 B# c3 ]7 f- ~but not so very much
9 q. w4 L7 p# P: npoetry. E- b9 s5 j% X) D2 q
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